Same old, same old

Incompetence is here to stay....the aid left an hour early at 7 pm tonight , no one bothered to tell us, or ask if we were still needing a shower, which we were. I had to talk to the desk and request a shower in the morning. The psychologist told mom she is ready to go home tomorrow ! ? What? I had a message on the machine that her meeting was rescheduled from today till this Wednesday. It makes no sense. She also was measured for a chair at Marianjoy which we have not received yet. Supposably, they give it to you upon your release, so I guess they expect her to fly herself home. I for one will be needing a full time shrink to decipher all the BS...I will not be writing a letter of recommendation either.


Mom is improving, eating well, but slow, having trouble only with meat it seems. Her facial expressions are very even, and she seems to chew easier. She had her yogurt with breakfast today, and another one showed up on her neighbor's dinner tray tonight, (mysterious, no?) Her posture was good today, no nap, a bit tired. She brushed her teeth no problem, rinsed, and we put the ball game on. She and I talked about Dad tonight. She's angry with him on one level. She says it was her turn, not his....She is working through it though. Her psychologist assured her that these feelings are fairly common for one who has been widowed. Her attitude in general is very good I think. She talks more often about returning home.

On the brighter side, Sonia and Dick and Elinor were visiting today. Thank you and keep up the visits, please. Lisa is hard-pressed this week, as Kris and I are both leaving to go to S. Carolina for Susi's 40th. I leave tomorrow, Tuesday, Kris leaves Wednesday, and John leaves friday as John and Kelly have an anniversary trip planned. Lisa can use all the help she can get as her boys are back in school and the sports schedule is grueling. I return Sunday night 9/4 so I will be around on Labor Day to relieve Lisa somewhat. There will be no therapies on the holiday, so visitors are encouraged.



I got mom two new herbal teas, Detox tea is supposed to help with swelling, and a chocolate flavored tea as well. Feel free to share a cup of tea when you are there!

Till next time...Karla
Kelly's bday gift is sitting on top of the hutch for the next time John and Kelly stop by. I worry that it will walk off....

A lazy Sunday afternoon

Mom and I visited for several hours through lunch time. Appetite was good, and told each other about our respective weeks, my vacation, and her birthday! She really enjoyed the arboretum, having susi here, and all the visits from friends. i checked out all her new clothes and we had a quiet massage day while watching WTTW. Her new gait belt (sp) is labeled with her name so it doesn't get mixed up with others. The pad Lisa made for the arm trough is really nice, much softer than the towel alone, and doesn't slip around. I was massaging mom's neck and discovered the head rest is removable, let's in more light around the back and is easier to maneuver the wheelchair too. I left it off, because she didn't seem to need it. Keep your eyes on this. I also had mom push with her foot so she got all the way back in the chair and was sitting straighter after a standing transfer - no complaints either. she loves her chocolate after ultram, because it helps with the bad aftertaste. Tea is out, so I am getting some that Ginger recommended yesterday when I spoke with her. She is doing well, taking up to seven steps, and looks forward to using the walker more often. She may be getting additional therapy at Rest Haven, too. In that case, she will visit with mom. If we know when she's coming we can arrange a nice lunch for the two of them. Mom laid down at about 3, was sound asleep by 3:30 and had legs elevated above heart. Her blood pressure was good, temp also good.

Positive attitude

Mom stood for 2 minutes today! She says it nearly killed her, but next week she will be up to 5....I was pretty impressed with the 2...moving in the right direction at last with this issue. We read the story to her about Ed O'Malley who also in his 70's had a left side stroke, but pneumonia and a tracheotemy to boot. He had swallowing issues too. He took about 9 months but is back living on his own in Chicago and rehabbed at Rest Haven. Told her Sara had a new vocation all lined up for her, inspiring others when she is well enough. we are going to Door County with the Marino side of Mike's family starting tomorrow....I told her to plan on coming with us next summer.

Mom's appetite was so-so. Dinner was a measly hot dog on a bun, chips, soup and cole slaw, but luckily, Mike brought her a Johnny's italian beef with peppers to substitute for the hot dog. She ate ok....still no yogurt for dessert. Mom also had a gift from Bernie, a Cubs hat, a card, and a new blanket from Lisa, two new pairs of shoes also from Lisa, aka her personal shopper. We brought Toby for a visit and he enjoyed meeting several patients. Mom seems disinterested in him when he's there, but enjoys hearing stories about how well he is adjusting, etc. Kris came tonight too, and Toby was truly thrilled to see him. Kris stayed to make sure mom got to bed after her shower with her feet elevated. I was glad to finally see a note to the staff in mom's room re: making sure to do dentures at night and check for them being in before breakfast every day.

Mom heard from Mary Lynn, her old boss at premier, and they talked about the staffing inadequacies of nursing centers all across the country. It is good to know mom's friends are keeping such good tabs on her, too.

New Link

Hello all,

Sara has found some great information that we all must read. Click on the link on the right side of this page, titled "Family Role in Recovery".

Thanks,
Mike

More gray hairs...

On me, that is. mom had a wonderful morning in that she had all of us over, including Kris' family, Lisa's family and Mike and I. She enjoyed our homemade quiche, real potato salad, some chips, and cofee cake. we had perfect weather, there was harmonica and guitar, a photo of Susi's new pool, and a photo of Toby in his new house. All this seemed like it might pick her up a bit, but that was temporary. we got back to the room, was very tired out, and lethargic. Depression, pain, typical stroke behavior, don't know. My hair is getting grayer by the minute! One consolation, she ate well. She thought it was realy funny that I was telling her she might be getting too skinny. She has told me that almost all my life, even when I am plump. Joanne Johnson came by too, and we were elevating very swollen legs....no Ted hose on. Went to lie down, no sling in room. lisa and I got to room staff meeting tomorrow with doc, Barbara, and new case worker. We spoke with nurse on duty...Carolyn....was very understanding, gave us Barbs boss' phone number in case we can't get anywhere with Barb. Lisa and I did the slide board with mom. She could hardly keep her eyes open long enough to get through it. Don't know if she is sleeping poorly, or meds are getting in her way? Is she so depressed that she isn't trying, or is she just having a bad week? We are all getting anxious to see her having such a hard time. I feel that our prayers are falling on deaf ears, so to speak. Men have always been hard of hearing anyway...I suggest we take a homeopathic approach, beef up her nutrition right away. good idea Susi, about the shakes with protein powder. Sara says cut her some slack, she could use it. Mom says the air in the dining room is freezing them all out. If you are there at or before dinner, can you all check to make sure she has her shawl or a jacket for her shoulders. We'll see what the meeting brings tomorrow. Jokes and good cheer welcome! Meanwhile, the gray keeps gaining ground.

Commonality

Hi all, Friday pm mom had the parade of children, John and Lisa (and Kirby) overlapping, Lisa and Karla overlapping, and Karla and Kris. We found her in better spirits earlier, and as the night wore on, she just got too tired to concentrate. She does the word puzzles in her red bag with relative ease. Dinner was indeed lame as Lisa would say. Her chicken was ground, completely dry on a white bun. We asked for mayo,(everyone at the table rejoiced) and we made a chicken salad with her lettuce and tomato, which she preferred on a cracker (a lame saltine is better than a lame white bun). She commented on how much she loves crackers. This is a good thing to bring for a treat. She prefers whole wheat, crunchier types. I brought some chocolate silk and she had about a cup of that. Her sugars are well within range, as she gets them taken every night right before eating. We should stay aware of this, as Sara has warned, a really low number (below 80?) is not good. She has been around 100-130 ish for several weeks. They have stopped bringing yogurt with dinner. I will call Amy in dietary to request yogurt again and soy milk. She has been really responsive in the past.

I apologized to mom for getting tough with her on Thursday night regarding all "the poor girls" who work there and how bloody hard they work. I emphasized that they have CHOSEN this work, that they are GETTING PAID, and that we are NOT AN INCONVENIENCE TO THEM! I was rather a bit too emphatic, I think. She said that's ok, she's not mad at me, etc.

Commonalities: she is eating poorly at dinner, losing weight, and avoids protein. She would benefit from homemade tuna and crackers, crackers and cheese, buona beef, and beans, soy milk, etc. She loves all of them. We would also do well to make an extra effort for meals on the weekend, when there's more time to fuss, and less therapy sessions. She also needs to drink MORE WATER. she always asks for hot tea with dinner, I make it, and it never gets drunk.

We might also find some reading re: stroke success stories. Sara had a good response to reading with her and taking turns (her janet ivanovich book is there).

We need to stick together, keep our eyes open, and keep the staff aware that we are watching them. Most of the nurses there are really nice, and she likes them.

What do you think about a day pass for a weekend day to go out? Maybe she needs a change of atmosphere? Her roommate got a four hour pass to go get her nails done! The weather has been beautiful, too.

Settling in

The pooch, that is. Toby's a bit under the weather - I think the food he ate at the kennel last week did not agree with him. He's a bit hoarse (not a bad thing right now!) probably from barking his head off at the kennel last week. And he's a bit confused - still very tentative around what he considers a strange house.

The good news - he's behaving very well. This is probably because he doesn't feel yet like this is his "kingdom" to rule. Our walks have been terrific, with zero incidents to report. We're both keeping him very close the entire time. Some freedom is curtailed, yet he still loves getting out.

We've set up a bed in the basement, where he stays during work hours and another upstairs next to ours. He's been using both well. We've set up his blanket in Mike's office, where he's been hanging out a lot...

Sleepyhead

No wonder, what a busy day can do. I just missed you guys, and we ate dinner, not much, but went to bed after wards. I did a foot bath and foot lotion, got her as comfortable as possible, and turned off the lights at 8:30. Nurses kindly buzzed me out. Dentures are cleaning....laundry delivery tomorrow. She is thrilled with the Toby news, and Mike will certainly be raised even higher in saintliness. Watch out for the shiny halo.

Toby Update

Mike took Toby to K-9 guy, Shawn, for an interview Friday afternoon. Toby walked into a room full of other dogs, mostly caged, and didn't freak out. One dog was being walked in the same room on a leash, and there was no disturbance there either. Could it be our Toby? Shawn said that Toby is probably not terrier at all, that many people use that term loosely. It is much more likely that he has mastiff in his blood, as the double dewclaws and brindle coat are more common to that breed. He could also have some pit bull in him. Officially, he's all mutt.

Shawn said Alpha dogs feel tremendous stress to be leading all the time, and the stress/responsibility is what makes them act out. He would be a lot calmer if he could relinquish that responsibility to his owner(s). He also marveled at Toby's excellent physical condition for his age - must have been all that squirrel chasing and those wonderful walks. Shawn didn't think the basement during the day would be a problem. He will need a bed area there, and possibly a bed area for nighttime that is separate. Based on the assessment, mike and I would like to adopt him, and let mom have occasional visitation rights. She said it's awfully nice of us to do it, and offered to pay for a dog run on the side of the garage. We probably won't do a run, but we will clean up the area for his use. We also have to make the basement a bit tidier, so he doesn't get into anything dangerous. Mike and I are working on that this weekend. Kris offered to help us install a gate to the basement. It hasn't been finalized, but we think his 'boot camp' will start on Aug. 19th when we go on vacation. At that time, we will relieve everyone from their assistance. The thought is that he can start off fresh with us, in a new home, after boot camp. Thank you all!

I can't believe it either! But it's a good thing.

Aah, Real Food!

Today the dietician and the pt got together and straightened out mom's dietary requests. For dinner there was barley and mushroom soup, bbq pork sandwich, pasta salad, oh my! A brownie and yogurt for dessert. It's nice when the right hand and the left hand finally talk to each other.

Sara arrived safely during dinner and she offered to locate a different style sling for mom. Thank Goodness! Mom wanted me to sew on some padding to the one she has, which would make it harder to adjust if needed. I luckily won't need to do that.

With the heat wave going for two days and more, the room is quite stuffy. All the common areas are fine, though. Kris is bringing a fan next time he comes. Doctor Mupa stops in to see mom tomorrow, and Sara will get details from him. Sara, call around if you need relief tomorrow after work. Kris is working, but I can meet up with you, as Mike is busy anyhow.

We made an appt to have Toby screened by the K-9 trainer this Friday to see if he is 'workable'. Keep your fingers crossed....

There are word puzzles in the red bag and Scrabble to do in the evening. The Cubs and Sox are equally well received, and the left arm excercises/stretches are in the chair pouch. Please do something every time you go. We need to coax in this area or she will get lazy in her visual acuity and she will get stiffer. I believe acupuncture was ordered, too. Sara will inquire about massage tomorrow, since I forgot on Monday.

Stay cool everyone.